Friday, March 14, 2014

Tuesday Political Quibblers Club: A Skeptics Delight for a Political Price

Somewhere in a basement in “Anywhere, USA” someone is pondering some premise of theory/thought that will make its way thru the bowels of the Interweb and one day become “truth” for a few.

Now whether that notion is political or historical in content will determine its validity amongst the masses of tin foil hats. Plus in today’s techie Social Media “Gotta an app” smothered world, it doesn’t take long for the notion to flow like oil from the Deepwater Horizon.

Take the other day for instance, I was dining out with my family and it must’ve been the weekly "Tuesday Political Quibblers Club” night out for the table next to us as their conversation ran a gambit of various zany political thoughts within minutes of being seated.

Now I don’t like to listen to strangers conversation, I’ll leave that to Agents Jones & Smith of the NSA to do. However this group of grown men that ranged in various age, was spitting out theory after thought in such high revolution that I can only compare them to that of a group of giddy 13 year old girls talking about a member of One Direction (honestly I've heard grown women talk the same as well about One Direction and it’s scary).

Yet one statement has kept with me only because it's intriguing. Now I'm paraphrasing this statement but it goes a little something like:

"What we really should do is split the US. The Northern States go Democratic, the Southern States go Republican and then we'll see who has the better ideology."

I missed what was said next as I was being pulled away by family, but this I know is an awesomely bad idea, yet had to ponder how the US would look if it would flourish.

Yet every theory/thought needs a nickname, so how about “The Quibbler: A theory for a new US Polity.”

Now there are gaps and holes to fill on the "Quibbler theory" as I was unable to finish listening in but I'm absolutely positive I can do some hot patch work better then a "Yinzer" road crew.

OK, so what would a split US look like and how to decide where the split exists between North and South? Well that’s easy if we use the Missouri Compromise.

See the Missouri Compromise helped set up the partition between impending Slave and Free States of any territory wanting to join the Union west of the Mississippi River as well as helped set up how future States would be formed by creating a border that runs along the 36th parallel of latitude. It helped to not have the cluster of States that we know of the East Coast.

So that covers Western States, as for the Eastern half, well we’ll use the Civil War divide.

Contrary to myth, the Mason/Dixon line was not the border between North & South during the Civil War even though it was regarded as such. Maryland never declared itself North or South and even to this day, Marylanders debate if they are considered one or the other.

So for this, Maryland will be considered a Northern state along with West Virginia and Alaska with Hawaii going to the South. So let’s do the math, that’s 28 Democratic states to 22 Republican states.

Seems a little off balanced from the start for the “Quibbler theory" but we’re just beginning.

So all Northern states shall be under Democratic governorship as well their state legislature and the equal for the Southern states under Republican leadership, doesn’t quite have the feel of a Free Republic.

So draw a line across the top border of California, follow that line across to Missouri and then down around Illinois the top of Kentucky, below West Virginia and Maryland all the way to the Atlantic. I know it's wordy to read but without a GPS someone might get lost.

But how does this split affect the business of Federal Government?

James Madison’s Federalist #39 states that "The House of Representatives will derive its powers from the people of America....The Senate, on the other hand, will derive its powers from the States, as political and co-equal societies."

Now under Constitutional Law, each State is guaranteed 2 Senate appointments which means under this theory the Senate shall be democratically led 56-44 as there are more Northern then Southern states.

Well looks like the political power dips further Left which doesn’t seem to be the intention of the “Quibblers theory.”

Under the same law, each State is given 1 guaranteed appointment to the House and other appointments are placed by size of populace. California, Texas and Florida have roughly 116 total Representatives and by “Quibblers theory" the House then would favor the Republicans 245 to 190.

As we see in today's reality, a split Congress is gridlocked and under “Quibblers theory" it strengthens political ideology divide with lopsided numbers that only the moderates of either party, you know those “RINO’s and Blue Dogs” poli-talkers despise, would be the only ones to help push legislation thru to the Oval Office.

It's that or an obscene amount of Executive Orders by whomever sits behind the Resolute Desk.

It's hard to tell how each State would be run with such a political unhinged balance amongst them. By unhinged I reference one political thought running about per State. Yes, I’m positive those reading that are Left/Right will stomp their feet and hold their breath that their party is the one truest. So let’s look at reality, because it appears these “theorists” are not part of.

Currently there are 29 Republican governors at the helm since 2011 and they are scattered across the land. But how are they doing compared to their Democratic equals?

Well Daily Finance released a “Top 5 Best & Worst” run states report not long ago and the results were:

Best 5: 5.Iowa (R), 4.Utah (R), 3.Nebraska (R), 2.Wyoming (R), 1.North Dakota (R)
Worst 5: 5.New Jersey (R), 4.Arizona (R), 3.Illinois (D), 2.Rhode Island (I), 1.California (D)

Doesn't say much for the governorship of New Jersey's Chris Christie and Arizona's Jan Brewer?

California being the worst run state is not a shocker, it's been that way for the past 30 years no matter which party is leading and please don't say "Well when Reagan was governor..." because that was 50 years past.

The average population between the "Top 5 Best" equals roughly 1,833,000, so it's quite easy to govern a small populace in wide open ranges when compared to the size of the “#2 Worst” and smallest state of Rhode Island.

What about the Richest and Poorest of States? Where’s all the wealth sitting or poor squatting? Well thanks to the Wall Street Journal, the list varies deeply from the "Best & Worst" run;

Top 5- 5.Hawaii (D), 4.Connecticut (D), 3.Alaska (R), 2.New Jersey (R), 1.Maryland (D)
Bottom 5- 5.Kentucky (D), 4.Alabama (R), 3.West Virginia (D), 2.Arkansas (D), 1.Mississippi (D)

It’s easy to say that New Jersey & Maryland should be on the list considering they are located near NYC and DC. All that wealth in Connecticut can’t be from WWE’s McMahon family, could it?

I’m sure I can research more “Best & Worst” lists from education, beer halls, roads, drivers and waistlines to dissect and tape together to figure which way to split the States into this or that. However I’m extremely nauseated with this “Quibblers theory" and believe it’s the silliest idea to come along since politicians reading Dr Seuss to explain their discourse.

This “Quibblers theory" of splitting the US between Democratic North & Republican South just doesn’t work even though it sounds great was first spoken and currently the States seem to be running quite well as they are, depending on “how well” one thinks.

That’s it, Slap the tap, pass the chicken wings and pay your political bill before someone figures out a better way to scam it away with another political theory


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